Consider this

Colossians 3:21. Fathers do not provoke your children to wrath and do not discourage them.   It is actually sin to discourage your children; the overarching paradigm of parenting is life and hope. (Peculiar to you and your child;  individual application. ) When you are done you have built trust , a platform to speak and be heard ( it must be selfless, which is the foundation of love). And then hope which is motivation to move and pay the suffering price of maturity which is victory in life. Along the way your frustration is a key to how much your flesh is involved in your actions; after all God says "what good is your anger" (Jonah 4:4) anger displays your self motivation to your children while you are calling them to die to the same. Timidity and self will have the same master as anger, self. In the end your personal battle with self creates a life experience for your family, building a platform for future relationships between you and your child's future family.  At some point within the home a mother should loose her control over her sons and exhibit an relationship built on respectful appeal. So your son learns to hear  the same from his future wife.  (1Timothy 2:12)